Is Valentine’s Day Really Necessary?
It’s nearly Valentine’s day, a day that provokes love and romance, at least to some people. To others, like the Sane People Against Valentine’s Day Facebook group, not so much.
So that begs the question. Do we really need Valentine’s day? Do we need all the fuss, all the media, all the lead up, all the anticipation for one day of love and romance?
Well, yes, the answer is yes, we do. Especially if you’re a women. Do you want to know why?
Heat flash. I mean, news flash. It all comes down to hormones.
John Gray, author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, discusses romance, hormones and estrogen dominance on quite a few youtube videos. Estrogen dominance? This was news to me. I thought estrogen dwindled as we aged.
Interestingly enough, according to Christine Northrup, M.D. and author of numerous books on women’s health, many women do not experience a drop in estrogen as they approach menopause. In this article, she lists the symptoms of estrogen dominance, symptoms that are much too familiar to me. Yikes, I think I’m being dominated.
So how do we become estrogen dominant in the first place?
We all know stress is a killer, but before it kills, it causes imbalances. In his videos, John Gray states that when we’re stressed we use up progesterone. I found an article on Female Hormones and Weight Loss that substantiates this. (Weight and/or fat gain around the abdomen and hips is a symptom of too much estrogen) Simply put, stress causes a release of cortisol and the body uses progesterone to make cortisol. So stress does eat up progesterone. And that not good.
We need progesterone.
When we lose progesterone, we become estrogen dominant. Estrogen speeds up the brain, progesterone calms it down. So the more estrogen we have in our blood, the more our brain speeds up, causing us to worry and to think more which increases cortisol production which feeds off progesterone, which makes us speed up and produce more cortisol, and . . . I’ll stop there. It’s a nasty cycle.
So what does all this have to do with valentines?
Women have a hormone that reduces stress. Oxytocin. This is fabulous news. You probably want to know how you get some. Well, it’s easy enough. We celebrate Valentines day. Romance is a super oxytocin producer. Even the anticipation of romance releases oxytocin. Even a hug releases oxytocin.
Want even more oxytocin? Prevention.com discusses 10 ways to increase your oxytocin production. But here’s an interesting quote: ‘Watching an emotionally compelling movie makes oxytocin surge 47%. Why? Our brains process the plot and characters as if they were in the room with us, Dr. Zak says.’
I don’t know about you, but I get much more involved in plot and characters when reading a novel than watching a movie.
So to balance your hormones, I’m suggesting you stop what you’re doing and read a romance or any novel that engages your emotions. Read it out loud to your partner. Do it for good health!
Wishing you a romantic valentine’s day filled with surging oxytocin!
If you’re looking for a fix, please join me on Sunday, Feb. 17th from 2 – 4 for a book signing and romance reading at Timothys, 321 Lakeshore Rd. E. Oakville. Map here.
Oxytocin! (May I call you Oxy? Golly, you’re so strong, perhaps I’ll just call you Ox) Where have you been all my post menopausal life?
Sharon, I can certainly see why the Valentine ‘Saners’ might object to one day for romance. Romance is an essential ingredient to a healthy, rounded life, hence our blog mission to celebrate romance everyday.
Sad to say, romance is an element in life that is easily brushed aside. After that new love passion becomes familiar, romance slips from priority numero uno to a spot farther down the list, out-prioritizing, perhaps, sorting the sock drawer.
Important to set aside time for romance. A little more regularly than once a year would be nice, but if that one day with hoopla, when most everyone on the planet has their cinnamon eyes and chocolate hearts tuned in to romance, the fever for love, roses, and tenderness becomes epidemic. Resistance is futile, there is no inoculation for love.
Very nicely said, Sherry. Valentine’s Day is just a reminder.
Interesting! You just may have convinced me to read a romance novel
If you need any suggestions, Kim…
Thanks for visiting, Kim. In my opinion, novels with a story focus on falling in love, feel good. I suppose that’s why romance outsells every other genre.
I hope you do find a romance novel you enjoy. Don’t forget to ask Liv for a recommendation
So I’m reading this thinking how much sense it makes. I mean, I need my current obsession with reading and writing romance to balance the stress of working full time night shift and raising teenagers, right? Let’s go explain that to the husband…
It does make perfect sense, Liv. We must read and write to save ourselves!
Oxytocin. Sounds like a prescribed drug. Prescribed by the romance doctor!
Love your post, Sharon, how clever to join hormone health and Valentine’s day in one article. I’m starting to think about Valentine’s day myself but I kinda know what my DH wants, and it’s what he wants ALL the time. Maybe I’ll add some spice to my oxytocin. What a cocktail that would be.
That sounds like a whole new article, Carole. Foods and spices to jazz up the romance. Lol on DH. No big surprises when it comes to the men.
What a marvelous lesson in love and good health. It all makes amazing good sense in that what’s not to love about love. Love is grand, for Pete’s sake! (That’s right, I’m talking to YOU,”Sane People Against Valentine’s Day.” Seriously? If ever anyone needed a little love …)
I love Valentine’s Day in it most simplistic form. True blue, sweet and honest gestures. I’ve always been and hope to stay a Heart shaped box of chocolates girl. No thank you to jewels worthy of a pirates chest, big ticket trips, and elaborate displays. That’s what anniversaries and birthdays are for. Make me a paper heart trimmed with paper dollies to frame a from the heart poem — the cornier the better — now, that’s true love.
As for romance novels, every night table looks so much nicer with a tidy pile
As a former kid’s craft expert, I love your paper doily valentine, Barbara! Corny has it’s benefits, throw in chocolate and Valentine’s is a winner!
I’m with you, I love to transition from workday to bedtime with a good romance. Makes for sweet dreams.
I must be in the midst of balancing my hormones. I’ve set aside my TBR books and have been jonesing for the romance novels, one right after the other. Great article, Sharon, lots of good information.
Thanks, Cora. Interesting how you’re going after the romance novels. I think intuitively we seek what we need.
Doesn’t chocolate stimulate Oxytocin too? If not, it should. I’m looking forward to sharing some 70% dark with my sweetie. Actually, he’s not as fond of dark chocolate as I am, so I may have it all to myself! I’m all for romance and now I have some scientific evidence that along with my B-vitamins my books are good for my brain. Bet hubby will love that!
Could be, Jess, especially if it comes with a hug. I remember from university days, oxytocin being related to child birth. I think it also starts contractions, but that’s too far from the romance spectrum to think about.
Enjoy your chocolate!
I never knew there was a group called People Against Valentine’s Day??…go figure! I think perhaps the day has been so built up…commercially…that it can certainly cause some lonely issues to be brought to the forefront, maybe that’s how the group started?
Love your heat flash news lol, good one Sharon!
Yes, Carole-Ann, you’re right. I can appreciate that valentines is something people don’t look forward to at certain times in life.
Keep the oxytocin flowing!